Barn guilt

I always end up feeling guilty when I can't get to the barn for whatever reason or when after a long day I just don't have the energy to ride.  Fawkes is not the kind of horse you can just jump on and play around.  This is a big part of the reason I love working with him, but it also means I can't phone rides in. I have to be present and attentive or he will pull some spook and spin crap and I will eat dirt.  Therefore, even though the weather finally thawed today and even though I got out of work at a reasonable hour, I just can't muster the energy to ride.

And I feel crappy about it.

Why though?  Fawkes doesn't care.  He doesn't have a particularly great work ethic and he isn't the most human oriented horse in the world.  He also is not much harder to ride after a week off than he is after a day off so that isn't going to make life any harder.

I think it is because we live in an area where there isn't much turn out so I feel responsible for getting there and getting him out of his stall.  I also feel like I am wasting money and his life when he just sits around.  The money question is valid, but his life?  My brain is just being deliberately idiotic.  I mean, exhibit A:

Not exactly the face of a horse begging to go out and work.  Actually, this is his "PEPPERMINTS?!?!?" face

He far prefers the days he gets to just hang out and eat.  With a couple minutes of running thrown in for good measure.  So I just need to put my big girl pants on, process the guilt, and move on.  I will definitely be riding this weekend, so I can see if Fawkes is going to make a liar out of my above statement about being fine after time off.  That is how horses work, right?

We lost our jumping trainer recently to changes at the barn, but I will get a dressage lesson in this weekend and then next weekend we are moving to our new barn with 2 different jumping trainers to choose from!  If things work out, I might even try a jumping lesson with the current barn's new jumping trainer before I leave, just to see.  I absolutely love getting different input on both my horse and my riding.